Advice - Your Rope

Reasons NOT to do rope

Isn’t it pretty! So hot! Super sexy! Ever so kinky!

But it’s not for everyone. And, to be frank, not everyone is suitable for rope. I’m not talking body shape, race, gender, sexual orientation or anything like that. I’m talking attitude. I’m talking mindset. Let me explain….

These are the reasons why you shouldn’t do rope:

1. You think by going to a rope event you’ll get to tie/be tied by “hotties”. Because look at all those people loving it on here and elsewhere. They must be up for it, right? WRONG!!! Those riggers and models have often been doing it for years, even decades and the stuff you see is carefully negotiated and choreographed. The more intense ties are done when trust and boundaries are fully established.

2. You crave touching someone on their butt, breasts, crotch or wherever it gets you going. Because they do that in porn, all those bunnies can’t wait to be under your rope, right? WRONG!!! That’s predatory behaviour, and sexual assault if you haven’t explicitly negotiated and gained consent.

3. You’re amazing. God’s gift to women/men/whichever gender. Who could resist your charms? Other rope people love that attitude and are bound to want to play with you, right? WRONG! You’re delusional and not safe.

4. You want someone to touch you, to be intimate with you. Either because you fancy them and think that’s a good way to get a rigger or bunny to like you – WRONG! If they don’t like you out of rope they won’t like you in rope. Or, you just want that snug/painful experience no matter who ties you. Don’t! Be really careful who you let tie you.

5. You’ve seen a few YouTube videos and think you know your shit. Going to an event will help you learn to do suspensions, because you’re obviously ready for that HUGE responsibility. WRONG!!! Go and learn from others. Tie and be tied alongside others, share insight and best practices. I’ve learnt just as much from bottoms as I have riggers.

6. You hear the word “no” or a variation of that, and start trying to convince them to change their mind, top or bottom. That’s disrespectful and abusive. You’re not safe.

If you want to do rope, get a reality check.

It’s edge play and is extremely risky. Get to know all the health and safety advice you can from different sources. Take your time.

You have no right to touch anyone one without explicit consent. You need to negotiate consent before engaging in rope.

Otherwise, don’t do rope.

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