Rope is like sex….
- People want sex for different reasons.
- Some people want sex, some don’t.
- Some people like sex a certain way.
- People only want sex with a certain type of person they are attracted to.
- It depends on who you are with, if you want sex at any given moment.
- Sex is an intimate act that leaves us vulnerable and in need of care.
- Some people want sex with one person in private, others in public with lots of people, and most somewhere in between those points.
- It depends on how you’re feeling at the time if/when/how/with whom you’d want sex.
- The slightest thing can turn your desire off, and sexual desire can take days to nurture.
- What good sex looks like for one person is different to another.
- No one should feel pressured into sex.
- Communicating clearly with others our desires, limits and health needs makes sex better.
- For most people, the more you have sex with someone, the greater the emotional bond you create.
- Different sex acts are more fulfilling than others to certain people.
- The types of sex you want varies over time. Sexual desire waxes and wanes, fluctuates.
- You can fulfil yourself sexually, if you want, with a little imagination, for most sex acts.
- You need to learn about safe sex and what you should do when mistakes happen.
- You need to learn about consent and how different people give consent differently.
- Some people lie/play/manipulate to get the sex they want. (Don’t tolerate it).
- Nobody is entitled to sex from anyone, no matter your status, experience or role.If someone violates your consent, it is very difficult to fully trust them again.
- Bad sex experiences are traumatic, and may stay in our bodies and minds indefinitely.
- Cultural expectations and media images influence what we think we want and is acceptable (which may not be true).
Agree to those? Substitute sex with rope, or any kink for that matter, and you’ll see just how careful we need to be when engaging in any rope act.
Cover image: full body binder, model Kinkydelinky, tie and photo by me.